Rating: Beer (18+) mainly because of very bad language.
As usual with my longer stories, you may choose the version that best fits your personal preference:

Relative Gold.html—the internet in all its glory with Dolimir's art to enhance the story. The background and font selelection is the same as this page. Read the whole thing, Relative Gold, or in parts: Part I ◄ ► Part II ◄ ► Part III ◄ ► Part IV ◄ ► Part V ◄ ► Part VI

Relative Gold.pdf—Same as above (or nearly), but compacted in an easily downloadable, one whole hunk, format. Please consider coming back and leaving a comment after reading.

Relative Gold.rtf—See Dolimir's's art here, then download or open the file in your favorite word processor. Adjust the font and other formatting, convert to read on a portable, use with a reading program, print it out, etc. Please consider coming back and leaving a comment after reading.